Stay in Your Own Lane

I am guessing when you read the title of this blog post, your mind might have went directly to thinking about driving your car and someone coming into your lane of traffic. However, this blog post has nothing to do with driving a car….. and well I don’t think you’d want advice or tips from me about staying your own line while driving anyways… I’m a B+ driver at best (HA!)

This blog post is all about staying in your own lane of life.

This post was inspired from a few different recent occurrences in my own life that happen to us all in one way or another.

Raise your hand if you have ever let someone’s opinion or comment stop you from doing what you truly wanted to do, raise your hand if you let someone’s negativity affect your day, raise your hand if you ever looked at someone else’s success and felt negativity towards them, raise your hand if you ever let the outside world detour you from even thinking something through and developing your own decision. I am truthfully guilty of all of these things as most of us are.

If you follow me on Instagram it’s likely you may have already heard this story. Over the past couple months, I have received multiple negative comments and contact me forms from people who visit this blog. Negative constructive comments are always accepted by me, but someone’s perception of who they think I am or how they view my life is never welcomed. I now have my comments where they have to be approved by me on this blog before they will show up because of how rude and unnecessary some comments have been.

These occurrences got me thinking…. “how often does this happen to everyone.?” This happens everyday whether it is online, in person, with our co-workers, with our family, or with anyone else. Someone offers an unsolicited opinion or perception of you, or you see something online that makes you feel unease whether it’s about your own accomplishments and worth or about what you “should” be doing. This is what I call driving outside the lines.

When we drive outside the lines, we allow others to determine how we feel about ourselves. It is HARD AF to not let other opinions affect you, but this is a choice we make. You can’t control your first thought, but you can control your second. If you catch yourself wishing to be someone else or letting an unnecessary comment bother you, work on making the choice to not let it. Like I said this hard, this is hard for everyone, but your happiness and success comes from you not from what anyone else has to say about you.

I spent many years of my life feeling like I wasn’t worthy because of my weight. I didn’t decided I wasn’t worthy because of it, but I let others affect me about what I weighed whether it was that I didn’t have abs (still don’t btw), or that I was ‘bigger’ for a pageant girl, or that I felt like I wasn’t as pretty as someone who was smaller than me. Looking back I wish someone would’ve just told me, “Hey Mads, stay in your own lane.”. … meaning stop worrying about what others think, stop obsessing, and if you want to make a change because it’s what you want, then do it.

Now with all of the access we have to each other through the internet, I believe it’s even easier to get caught driving outside the lines. How many of us are guilty of seeing something online of someone’s success or a beautiful photo of them and automatically feeling smaller or less worthy? I am sure all of us have. I am a big fan of self auditing what I’m doing and how I am feeling. If I catch myself feeling this way after seeing something online, I first as why, and second ask how am I going to not feel this way again or do better moving forward?

Staying in your own lane is all about focusing on yourself. Focusing on what want, what you need, and the life you’re creating… it’s not about not socializing or being self centered, but it’s about staying focused and grounded on who you are today, not who you were yesterday or who someone thinks you are. I often get alot of crap from people for being involved in too many things, being opinionated, say F*** a lot, being single at the age of 28, or just doing whatever it is that I want. I used to struggle with other people projecting their perception of me, onto me then me having to explain who I am to them. The perception someone has of you is not your responsibility. I learned that I can’t control how someone else views me, if it makes them uncomfortable, if they don’t agree with my choices, or if they don’t agree with my lifestyle. I stopped explaining myself to people who projected their opinion of me onto me.

Staying in your own lane is about embracing those things that make you different and unique, just by being you. It also means being aware of how you feel and knowing you are in control of how you feel, who you view on social media, and who you keep in contact with.

It’s incredible how much better you will feel staying in your own lane of life and how true it will feel to you. I would love to know how you stay in your own lane…..feel from to comment, DM, or email me about how you stay in your own lane.

As always,

Thank you for reading!

XO,

Madison